Our Testimony: How God Brought Us Together

On our one year anniversary, I decided to do something a little different. I wanted to tell our testimony of what we BOTH went through before God eventually brought us together! In this brief narrative, you will get to hear from both sides of our story. For convenience, I have made our story available in text and soon video format. I hope you enjoy! :) -Priscilla

Priscilla: I remember the first time I laid eyes on him...it was at a Generation X Concert on August 22, 2009 which was hosted by a mutual friends church at the time...Bread Of Life. I just remember thinking, man that guy can really sing! I honestly do not think he even noticed me that night. However, after a few Reflect services a year later at Image Student Ministries (ISM), I began to fall in love with his voice.

Marcus:

Priscilla: I started attending Sunday night services and ISM's Mid-week service off and on throughout the year after I was re-baptized on May 2, 2010. There was a constant tug in my spirit to go back to North Cities even though I was a member at another church...

Fast forward to 2011- I officially joined my current church at the end of January and was learning to hear the voice of God clearly as He started using me to pray for others in the altar. It wasn't until Spring that I really began to pay more attention to him and even told our mutual friend that I liked him......that was until I found out his age. At this point, I was interested in becoming friends and getting to know him better because he seemed like a cool person, but I felt like he may have misinterpreted my friendliness and sorta pushed me away...

Marcus:

Priscilla: As time went on, I began to pursue God and started to have a few visions and dreams of which a few have come to pass. I was eager to receive confirmation from the Lord about my calling along with some other things I had been praying about, so I asked Him to show me on a specific date He brought to my mind. In the past, the Lord would bring specific dates to my mind when I would seek him in prayer about certain things...other times I would speak it out in faith and He always came through! God answered that prayer On March 23, 2011 as Bro Joe Ellis confirmed in the Holy Ghost what I sought the Lord on.

I remember being completely broken that day bawling before the preaching even began because God was ministering to my spirit throughout the day. I continued to work the altar as usual that night and at one point I saw B across the room on his knees praying before the Lord in his red shirt and blue jeans. :) I inquired of the Lord in my spirit these exact words "Aww, what's B still doing in the altar? I already prayed for him." I then felt an impression in my heart/spirit "that's my husband." I thought I either heard wrong or was loosing my mind and I dismissed any idea of being with him until I had another vision Mid-April where the Lord showed me something specific he has in store for the both of us.

Marcus:

Priscilla: Even though I had a few more visions and dreams, words of "confirmation" from others who do not know either one of us, and God using people around me to confirm some things I have seen in those visions and dreams...I had a few Gideon moments where I wanted to test the Lord through a series of "If this is your will, then let this happen..." and so on.

Marcus:

Priscilla: For a while, I wished that God would have just told me a simple "no" as He had done in the past with other guys and I remember asking Him, "why, why God did you show me this?" Life was sooo much simpler not knowing some things. Looking back now, I realize the Lord showed me some visions or dreams in advance (not only to teach me to have faith when He brings them to pass) so that I could intercede for His will to be done, have encouragement in the Lord, and....

Marcus:

Priscilla: I reached a point in my walk where enough was enough and I begged God to take away every feeling I ever had for this man from my heart completely. I could not stand having feelings for him while he was with someone else whom he considered "walking down the aisle with" and his family already adored her. I found a sister in Christ to stand in agreement with me, and shortly after praying...I saw him the following Sunday. I no longer felt any attachment or strong feelings for this man even though I still cared about him reaching his full potential and calling in Christ. In my attempt to try and move on, I started dating another guy whom I grew fond of overtime.

Marcus:

Priscilla: Even though I had let go of him and left him to God, I still thought about him occasionally and would keep him in my prayers as he came to mind. Even in my letting go, something about him still drew me to him...


Marcus:

Priscilla: I reached a certain point where I became discouraged "waiting" on God's promises to manifest that I sort of threw in the towel and gave up praying for "him." It was almost like telling God, "I'm tired, I give up! Three years is wayyy too long to wait in my book." Despite the children and calling He showed me, I grew weary holding onto His promises overtime. I basically developed the "Que sera sera" (whatever will be, will be) attitude. Three years went by and I decided to move onto another relationship.

Marcus:

Priscilla: I reached a place where I knew I had to surrender all by "letting go and letting God," so I laid him on the altar one last time. Despite all the visions, dreams, and prophetic confirmation...I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. It was a scary place to be in because I often wondered if His will had changed overtime, but it allowed me to put my total trust in God.

Marcus:

Priscilla: I believe God ultimately used the situation we were both placed in to grow the necessary patience I needed in order to be a mother and wife in my life.

Even though we know that for those who love God, all things work together for the good for those who are called according to His purpose... DO NOT give up on the promises of God for your life!!! If He has showed you something, stand firm on the Word of God and even put Him in remembrance of His Word. There is power in the tongue and when you speak things forth, you release things into the spirit realm. That is why we ought to bless and not curse one another.

EXAMPLE BELOW:

Anthony: It was a hot Sabbath day after church and my friend, Kenya, said she would take me over to meet Maeling if I’d stop harassing her about it. So over we went…

Maeling: I was chatting with a few of my girlfriends after church, when Kenya walked over and introduced us to one of her friends, Anthony. It was funny because my friends and I were just joking about how there weren’t any guys our age at this particular church. Anthony seemed very polite and we shook hands …

A: I walked over cool, calm and collected. I said hi and shook her hand and promptly looked away. I was nervous after that.

M: Well after being introduced, the group of us started talking about dinner plans and decided to get together for dinner. We invited Anthony to come along with us, but he said he already had plans but said he would try and stop by later.

A: So after I said I would catch up with them later, I tried not to run back to my car because I was so excited, and I had to make it back to see Maeling. So I got in “Bertha” and  was driving like a mad man all the way to the Southside while they were over in Midtown. I got to my aunt’s house, said my hello’s, ate some food and promptly drove back to Midtown. By the way, the food was good ( Just in case you’re reading this auntie).  I finally made it to this Indian cuisine place, where I knew I wasn’t going to like it all…but Maeling was there. It was hot, I was nervous, hands were sweating, face was greasy but I was going in.  Because it’s rare you find somebody so beautiful.

M: So we ended up at this Indian place for dinner, which I absolutely loved! We were all having a great time chatting, when Anthony showed up and ended up sitting across from me at the table. He didn’t come across very talkative, but that changed when I mentioned that I had been living in Atlanta for several years but hadn’t really explored the city.

A: There were a couple seats open. One at the end of the table, and one directly across from her, so obviously I chose the one directly across from her. I didn’t want her to forget my face. I wanted to talk to her, but I didn’t want it to seem like that was the only reason I came to the dinner (you know I gotta play it cool).  So I just chimed in here and there, whenever there was something I could relate to. I was surrounded by a whole bunch of females, which isn’t a bad thing…but I was only focused on one that day.  I asked Maeling how long she had been living in Atlanta, and she said she had been living here for years. Then I thought to myself, geez Louise this girl has been here that long and this is the first time I’ve seen her? Crazy man, crazy. Smh (inside my head though…Gotta keep it cool. You know what I’m saying.) So she started asking me how long I had been living in Atlanta and where were some cool places to hang. I think she was just being nice for conversation. And then she joked about me being her tour guide of Atlanta but I was dead serious when I heard her say that.  I was definitely going to take her up on that offer.

M: During our conversation at the table, I discovered that Anthony was born and raised in Atlanta. I then started to joke with him that he should be my tour guide of the city since I had been living in Atlanta for a while, but hadn’t really explored the surrounding areas. Well, after that, there wasn’t much more talking between me and Anthony at the table. After dinner though, we were all outside discussing our plans for the rest of the evening. I love to salsa dance and suggested that idea to the group. Everyone was up for it and Anthony even said he would try and join us later.

A: Yea…I had never danced before in my life. I wasn’t sure if  I was going to make it or not. But I had to make sure that when she closed her eyes that night, she saw me. So a brother was going to get out there and try. So I went home and googled salsa dancing clothes. After I got some images, I looked in my closet and not one thing in my closet looked like what I saw. So I just put on a shirt with some shoes and said I hope she doesn’t think I look like a bum. I wanted to look good because I knew I wasn’t going to dance well. Kenya was texting me and was telling me to hurry up, so I hopped in “Bertha” and hightailed it to Kenya’s so we could meet up with Mae.

M:  I arrived at the salsa spot with my friend Candyce and was super excited about actually using the new latin ballroom dancing shoes I had just purchased! We decided to wait around for the others before we started dancing though. Some of my other friends joined us and we were ready to roll when we realized that Kenya hadn’t arrived yet. We knew she didn’t live that far away so we were confused as to what the hold up was. That is when we were informed that she was waiting for Anthony to get to her place so they could ride over together. So yea…it was all Anthony’s fault.

A: When I walked in the door, the music was blaring and there she was, spinning in circles with her little fro. I didn’t know she was “Natural Chica” at that point. I went over scared out of my mind, because I was looking at these guys’ feet moving and I knew my feet weren’t going to move like that. Candyce and Kenya were helping me get my bearings out there, because I was definitely tripping over my feet. Candyce was counting out loud and telling me not to look at my feet. Then finally Mae decided to come over after she was done spinning around, to help this struggling brother. Finally I started catching on, and she said, let’s go to the main floor. And we started dancing.. So I was excited. I didn’t want to step on her feet. I was nervous about that part, so I was looking down. And then she started talking to me but I couldn’t hear what she was saying. I was hoping it wasn’t anything important and I didn’t want to lean in because she might have thought I was trying to kiss her or something, so I just said “uh huh”. To this day, I didn’t know what she was saying, because she talks so quietly. It was beautiful. Her hands in mine, moving to the rhythm of the salsa beat.

M: I was honestly surprised that Anthony even showed up. After all it was just him and a bunch of us women. (Wait…I guess that could make some sense). In any case, we were all having a great time, but I did notice that Anthony had never gone salsa dancing before so I decided to help him learn the basic salsa steps. He actually caught on pretty quickly, although it was hard to keep him from looking down. We did get to dance together for a bit that evening. Overall, it was an exciting night just getting to hang with my buddies and making a new friend.

A:  The funny thing about this night was that I was ripping and running all over the place just trying to be in this girl’s face and she had no idea. I left that night without her phone number or email because it was the first day that I had met her and I didn’t want to be pushy. I figured we’d cross paths again (Gotta play it cool) I left that night so pumped because I knew that if things went right, she could be the one.

From that very first encounter, we planted a seed of friendship that has bloomed into an amazing love. We are so happy to be at this point in our lives and grateful to God for blessing us with each other. We look to Him as we begin this union and at the same time, we feel extremely blessed to have the love and support of our family and friends. 

Almost 5 years ago, Broc caught my eye. He was handsome and charming...and I...well, I was a Facebook stalker.

Yes. It all started on Facebook....but like so oh-so-many short-lived Facebook crushes before us, we quickly lost touch and went about our lives. Honestly, this was probably the best thing that could have happened...because we both had a lot of maturing to do.

Life happened and we soon found ourselves setting out on our own separate directions. In fact, not only did life take us in different directions.....but it took us to opposite ends of the country. I began college at Howard Payne University in Brownwood, Texas, and Broc moved back up north to attend Indiana Bible College in Indianapolis, Indiana.

Ironically enough, we somehow managed to "miss one another" time and time again at various conferences, events, and hang-outs. I distinctly remember attending a conference in Lufkin, Texas when Broc was home on break from college. I spotted him across the tabernacle and pointed him out to a friend of mine, knowing that he looked SO familiar to me. When I asked who he was, she replied that he was from out-of-state but she thought he was married. It wasn't until years later that I found out that he had been there at the conference and made the connection.

Broc was always "THAT GUY" for me.....the one that I checked up on from time to time to see what was happening in his life. He was the one guy that I always thought about....even though we never had anything even close to a relationship before. I didn't quite understand what it was....but I knew that he was a catch and that who ever was with him was definitely a lucky lady!

In April 2012, Broc and I reconnected randomly through Facebook again (thanks to an adorable picture of him in coveralls..hehe) and we began to text. I would like to tell you that it was a fairytale beginning....but I was finishing my last month of my  business degree and wasn't really sure that I was ready to commit to anything but my own dreams to move to Austin after college....so I gave him the run-around for several weeks. He was definitely patient with me.

I wasn't looking for anything......and so it caught me off guard when I began to have feelings for him. I had been so dead-set on "not belonging to anyone but me"....but I soon realized that I wanted to be something to him. Something important. I fell in love with him before our first date....and on the way home, I called my mother in tears because I knew I had found the man I was going to marry.

Long-distance relationships are tough, but thanks to Facetime and unlimited text messages we made it through the longest summer of my life as Broc interned as a youth pastor in Detroit the summer of 2012. He moved back to Dallas at the end of the summer...and the rest is history.

Broc has been my rock...my best friend...my partner-in-crime...my love. I am so excited to be his wife soon...mother of his future little Broc-lettes...and partner in ministry. I am marrying my best friend...and there is nothing sweeter. I never imagined that I'd find someone so wonderful....he's a God-thing in my life. I'm so excited for this milestone in our story together and the many happy years ahead as husband and wife.

What's At Your Center?

I haven't been feeling like myself for the past few months and by a "few" months I mean a little over a year and a half. It took some heartfelt prayer and "soul searching" in order to find out why I have been feeling this way lately. I had to make time to pray, seek the Lord's face, and write down everything that came to my mind afterwards to figure out what exactly happened.

I went through a season that I would refer to as my "awkward phase" where I felt as if I was "just passing by" or better yet a stranger in someone else's body. Thank God that seasons change and do not always last very long! For me, it began with putting one thing before my quiet time with God - work. A little over a year ago, I was working 10 hour shifts at another job which was physically demanding and by the time I came home from work- I was ready to crash and burn.

It was a domino effect.

Shortly after getting into the routine of working all the time, it became easier to spend the majority of my free time relaxing "just to escape" through the media before repeating the same thing the following day.

Garbage In = Garbage Out

Whatever you mediate on will become magnified!

For example, if you spend your time watching scary movies "just for fun"...don't be surprised if you find yourself wrestling with the spirit of fear.

Do not compromise your convictions for carnality.

I can only pour out as much into others that is being poured into my spirit. That is why it is important to be renewed daily through spirit-led prayer and meditating upon the Word of God! 

"Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee." [Psalm 119:11]

I want God to take back full control over my life which includes my heart, calling, relationships, devotion, prayer life, and most importantly how I spend my TIME. It's so easy to get "caught up" with life- that is why it is important to set your priorities.

I realize now that:

I need to walk in forgiveness daily...

I need to show mercy to others...

I need to be moved with compassion toward others...

I need to walk in love...

• "If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same...36 Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful." [Luke 6:32-33;36]

• "Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses." [Proverbs 10:12]

When I decided not to practice this for season, I learned the hard way that I can't swim upstream or against the tide and win...eventually the wave will come crashing down! In other words, I can't go against how God created me to be and still stand strong. It is like expecting a fish to survive on dry land.

I have to make time for all of my relationships- it doesn't just "happen" by itself.

This past Wednesday in class, I was reminded me of the verse [Matthew 6:21]: "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." and these three things came to mind:


1) Where was your time invested? Did you spend more time investing in the kingdom of God and wherever He has placed you...storing your treasures up in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroys...

• I'm reminded of the story of Martha and Mary. While Martha was distracted with much serving...her sister Mary chose to sit at the Lord's feet and He replied to Martha by telling her that Mary chose the "better portion"...to sit at Jesus' feet and listen to His teaching. [Luke 10:38-42]

"So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom." [Psalm 90:12]

2) What did you do with the resources I gave you?

• When you are faithful in the little things such as your obedience in tithing, prayer, and devotion...God will entrust you with more. "Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy Lord."  [Matthew 25:23] 

3) How did you use the talents you were given?

• I'm reminded of the parable of the talents. [Matthew 25:14-30] A talent is a natural God given gift or ability. In this scenario, it is used as an illustration of a monetary reward...however, we still need to use the talents and gifts that God has given us ultimately for His glory. Unlike the slothful servant, we must multiply what resources He has given us and not simply bury our gifts and talents. What He has entrusted us with is given for the edification of the saints. We will all reap what we sow!

In conclusion, I have learned where you spend the majority of your time is what matters most to you! Strategize to prioritize! 

I thank the Lord for His goodness, faithfulness, patience, kindness, forgiveness, compassion and steadfast love toward me. He never ceases to amaze me! I am still a mess in the making to reflect His image and become more like Him. I do not want to be the person whom others want me to be, but the person God designed me to be! 

In the end, I have learned not to be a people pleaser, but a God pleaser. :)

P4CM | Passion 4 Christ Movement (Spoken Word)

I was recently watching spoken word artists on YouTube and these are a few of my favorites thus far by Janette McGhee also known as MissTerious Janette...ikz (pronounced mysterious genetics.) Despite overcoming adversity growing up, she has been a performing artist in the areas of poetry, dance, and music for over 18 years! I hope the videos below are an encouragement to all who stumble across it. Enjoy! :)

For more information about the Passion 4 Christ Movement, visit P4CM.com

Disclaimer: The original recording can be found at the following links:  [ Ready or Not by RHETORIC Poets Ezekiel & Janette ]  [ I Will Wait For You ] and [ 31 Status ]

Update: My Progress

Earlier this week I couldn't sleep, so I began to type. As I laid in bed, I began to reflect on major changes that I have noticed in my life recently- whether some may perceive it as a good thing or bad. I feel like an update is looong overdue! I realize that I have been slacking BIG time on writing, but who reads blogs anyways. ;)

1) I have officially become somewhat of an introvert

Ha. I guess this is not really news... :)

2) I've matured in the way I handle and approach situations

As an old friend of mine would say, we thank God!

3) I've grown a little more in patience

Every growth in patience is an achievement for me because I can see the progress and growth I'm making in God with His guidance. I noticed that I have become more tolerant of people. For the most part, I've always had a calm demeanor...but lately I have been feeling a deep calm-stillness in my spirit. I don't know what to call it, but hey- I like it!

4) My love for God has grown as well as my attitude of gratitude

I guess this is pretty much self-explanatory...

5) I've grown in a deeper love for people...even strangers

I guess I should attribute my love for others growing as I'm learning to fall in love with Jesus all over again. It seems like I'm meeting new people every week or so and I LOVE it! The only down side to my growing heart of compassion is that I often feel more vulnerable to get hurt easily.

6) I prefer listening as opposed to speaking

It's funny when I think about this because I remember back in High School how several of my friends and siblings would say: "Priscilla, you talk too much!" Lol Now- I do not concur! Oh, how things have changed! Today I was reminded of the scripture in James 1:19 "...let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak..." I believe God has been teaching me this. If I seem suspiciously quiet now-a-days, it is not because I have a lot on my mind or that I have nothing to say. I would just rather listen.

7) I've become more lady-like...no more tom-boyish ways

I grew up in a household with brothers. This resulted in me sharing a lot of the same activities with them from video games to sports as well as friends. In fact, majority of my close friends growing up were guys. I guess I felt that I could relate and be more transparent around them. Something has changed in my spirit this past year that even if I tried willingly to resort to my old ways, I can't. I believe women can still be fun and maintain their femininity. I'm not going to lie. There are occasions that I miss interacting with the opposite sex, but then I realize the importance of setting and maintaining boundaries. I can't believe the day has come where my female friends outnumber my guy friends! Through it all, one thing still remains the same. I can still count the number of my genuine friends with the fingers on my left hand.

Change is not something that happens all of a sudden overnight. It took years for some habits to form, and it may even take some years to break. By the Grace of God I am not the same person I was about 5 years ago when God began to do a work in me and thank the Lord He's not finished yet! 

Disclaimer: Playing video games, sports, or preferring male companionship does not necessarily make one tom-boyish.

The Power of Forgiveness

In the image above, the Power of Forgiveness was demonstrated by the Amish Community after the Nickel Miles School shooting. I was wondering why for a whole week straight, forgiveness seemed to be the theme of the day and now I finally understand.

Something God taught me recently is that forgiveness is a choice and it's not easy. You can choose to either hold on or let go! When I told God today I will choose to forgive everyday those who wrong me, either knowingly or unknowingly- I literally felt a weight lift from my spirit. You see, un-forgiveness will either keep you bound or weight you down and that is what the enemy wants. Jesus is LORD of all and the only one with the authority on earth to forgive sin. We are to forgive one another as Christ has forgiven us continually because love covers a multitude of sins. Whoever covers an offense seeks love. If you are truly a man or woman after God's own heart and desire to please Him, the wicked will not go unpunished such as in the life of David. God fought His battles for him because he was a man who sought to do the will of God no matter what. His Word says: I desire mercy, not sacrifice. James 2:12-13 also states: "For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment." Despite all those individuals who wronged David, he learned how to show mercy to his enemies.

Whom the Son sets free, is free indeed! No more shackles, no more chains...no more bondage- I AM FREE. Do not let un-forgiveness, anger, or bitterness dwell in your heart because if you do, there will be no room for the love of Christ to grow or to be made perfect in your heart. It doesn't matter if you loose everything overnight like Job: your children, home, wealth, health etc because God is still sitting on the throne and in control. I'm just now realizing even if you know some things by the Spirit of God, what you choose to do or how you respond is also a test. Without Faith, it is impossible to please God. He wants you to truly see how much faith you have in Him as He allows you to go through some trials and tests because He already knows. In the end, though some may have thought that both David and Job hit rock bottom, they were ultimately blessed with more than they started off with.

"If you repay evil for good, evil will not depart from your house." Proverbs 17:13

Train Up A Child In The Way He Should Go...

I have no clue how I came across this video today, but I'm glad I did! It touched me to see someone so young on fire for God and being used mightily for His glory! Jekalyn Carr (no relation to Kurt Carr) is a 15 year old traveling Evangelist who knew the call of God on her life from a young age and answered it. This is the result of two parents who recognized the call on their child's life and with God's guidance, knew how to "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." [Proverbs 22:6] It is important for parents to be forerunners- not only for their kids, but the generations to come. I just wanted to take the time to encourage the younger generations to "press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." [Philippians 3:14] The Apostle Paul wrote to Timothy: "Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity." [1 Tim. 4:12] This young woman is an example to all; you are never too young to be used by God when you live a consecrated life unto Him.

Isaiah Jackson- another child God is raising up for such a time as this! 

"Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants
You have ordained strength, 
Because of Your enemies,
That You may silence the enemy and the avenger." [Psalms 8:2]

Disclaimer: The original recordings can be found at the following links: [Jekalyn Carr Sings Alpha & Omega]  and  [You Won't See the Wind or the Rain]

Developing an Attitude of Gratitude

My spirit was lifted this morning after listening to this song by Indiana Bible College titled: La Buena Vida- I just had to share. :)  Check out the video below or click here.

 

I know I have been M.I.A lately; I've been wrapped up with school and Bible College full-time, 27 hours is no joke! However, all of this has caused me to lean on the everlasting arms of God and depend on Him for strength! A lot has happened since my last update. For starters, I came back from a life changing trip this weekend in Pine Prairie, Louisiana. I met a lot of amazing, hospitable individuals- of which, some helped guide and teach me some things about myself. Going on this trip helped me to see others through the eyes of God. Due to all the spiritual dark things that occur in that part of Louisiana, the church is in constant battle and prepared through spiritual warfare prayer and I could feel it the when I came into the church. The first night of the trip, we broke loose in POWER-packed prayer that filled the sanctuary! It was truly liberating to be in an atmosphere like that. It's time for God's people to press in prayer and in the word like never before!!!

I'm excited about all the things God is doing in my life right now. In this season I'm in- I've learned to be content in all things and worship God from a heart of thanksgiving and press in prayer on a deeper level- the type of prayer that will shake a jail cell. There is POWER that comes when your in that intimate place of prayer or intercession, being word fed, spirit led, and having a heart of gratitude as you worship the living God. Jesus is drawing me into that place of intimacy where it's just me and Him with no distractions---and my spirit has been content because of it. This is a season where I've learned to be content while single and would not have it any other way! I have time to do more things for God and myself-The Apostle Paul wasn't lying!;-) For some individuals, it takes longer to realize the importance of understanding their identity in Christ, to learn to put Him first, and being content while doing so. When you understand your identity is in Christ and who you are in Him, it doesn't matter what other people say or think about you. Once you do, He will begin to trust you with more, open doors, and elevate you into a deep place of intimacy with Him.

I've been talking to one of my close friends about the things I want to do next semester, not only to take me even deeper spiritually, but for myself as well- to enjoy the little things in life. For starters, I want to attend more prayer meetings weekly where I feel the liberty to break loose and not worry about being too loud. There are several things that I am passionate about- dreams and visions God has placed in my heart, but I have allowed myself to get so busy that some of them have gone unfulfilled. I got excited today thinking of the goals I am setting for myself next semester as I take another well needed rest. As I have mentioned in previous posts, there are talents that I was once passionate about and as I take time off to grow spiritually and focus even more on God and ministry- I will have more time to develop these. One good thing that has come from taking 27 hours this semester is that I had to learn not to procrastinate, but to prioritize and get ahead as much as possible just to find a little spare time to relax or even sleep. Some things I haven't done in a while include: pleasure reading, working out, cooking, art, decorating, studying/interpreting other languages, and waking up before 7 A.M.  :-) If you don't make time to rest, it can have a toll on you emotionally, spiritually, and physically when there is no balance.

You're never too young to live for God or fulfill some of the promises He has in store for your life at a young age. Timothy, David, Jeremiah, and Samuel were all young, but God still used them in mighty ways. Continue persevering and enduring the trials that are sent into your life to refine and purify you as gold while manifesting the fruit of the spirit and wisdom necessary to be used in that way. God is looking for individuals who are ready to say "Here I am Lord, use me for your glory." Until we get in that "sold out" for Christ mindset and stop allowing things to hinder us (distractions) from reaching our full potential, we will never reach our destination where God wants us to be spiritually in order to fulfill our calling to the fullest! 

Amazing things will begin to flow and manifest around and through you when you learn to flow in the spirit of Christ which dwells in you. You need to get full and running over through prayer, praise- worshiping God in spirit and in truth, and walking in the love of Christ. When you get full and running over with the spirit of Christ, He will fill your heart with an overwhelming amount of joy, peace, and the love of God through the Holy Ghost that you can't help but to be filled with the same amount of gratitude. Ezekiel understood this when he talked about water flowing from the temple. He said that at first he was ankle deep, then knee deep, waist deep until it was deep enough to swim in- a river that could not be passed through. It is important to learn how to tap into that life-source the Holy Spirit brings at any given time when you get in that deep place of intimacy with God and are prepared to minister in season and out of season. The same resurrection power that raised Christ from the dead is the same power that lies within you when you are filled with the Holy Spirit.

It's so easy for us to have the greener grass syndrome when we look at someone Else's life and think that they have it easier. I read a quote yesterday by Regina Brett which said: "If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone Else's, we'd grab ours back!" Perspective is Key- you can look at other individuals in ministry and say "I want what they have," but are you willing to pay the price or make the sacrifices necessary in order to be used in a similar manner. To sum up it all up: I'm reminded of the Apostle Paul- he was shipwrecked three times, bitten by a poisonous snake, left for dead -yet this man still knew how to give thanks in all things and count it all joy if he suffered for the name of Christ. He had an attitude of gratitude!

"Dying To Self"

When you are forgotten, neglected, or purposely ignored, yet you do not sting or hurt with the insult or the oversight, but your heart is happy, being counted worthy to suffer with Christ — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When your good is evil spoken of, when your wishes are crossed, your advice disregarded, your opinions ridiculed, and you refuse to let anger rise in your heart, or even defend yourself, but take it all in patient and loving silence — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When you lovingly and patiently bear any disorder, any irregularity, any impunctuality, or any annoyance; when you can stand face to face with waste, folly, extravagance, spiritual insensibility…and endure it as Jesus endured it — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When you are content with any food, any offering, any clothing, any climate, any society, any solitude, any interruption of the will of God — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When you never care to refer to yourself in conversation, or to record your own good works, or seek after recognition, but you can truly love to be unknown — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When you can see your brother prosper and have his needs met, and can honestly rejoice with him in spirit and feel no envy nor question God, while your own needs are far greater and in desperate circumstances — THAT IS DYING TO SELF.

When you can receive correction and reproof from one of less stature than yourself, and can humbly submit inwardly as well as outwardly, finding no rebellion or resentment rising up within your heart — THAT IS DYING TO SELF!

Disclaimer: I did not write this poem nor could I find the original author at this time.